Tuesday, 28 May 2013

Lessons and blessings from the month of May

This month has been a bit of a trying one for various reasons, which aren't really worth going into, however I am glad that I am still able to stay strong, and keep smiling (well occasionally haha).

So .. what things have I learnt during these times? Well, the first one is that I realise how important it is to look after myself. To listen to messages that my body is giving me. To stop and rest when I need to rest. To treat myself to something good. To go for walks. I am not the kind of person who can do lots of stuff when I'm feeling low on energy, so it has been important for me to say to myself 'Look I cannot do any more of (whatever task) .. I surrender and trust that things will work out .. I honour my feelings' .. etc.

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I have also started doing some inner child work Ho'oponopono (read this blog post from my friend Kelly to get a better understanding). I have resisted doing this kind of thing for a while, but, it's important to realise why we act in ways which are not beneficial and why certain patterns keep repeating themselves. A lot of it, in fact probably most of it, is down to things that were programmed into us during childhood. It's not an overnight fix, but it looks like it's going to help.

Another thing I am finding important is to listen to my heart and not just do what I think I 'should' be doing.
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This is not always easy when you're on benefits and you're supposed to do certain things to meet government criteria. But the whole system has gone completely pearshaped and it is hard to get much enthusiasm for the jobs that are out there. I am sick of doing jobs which serve little purpose except topping up a greedy businessman's bank account. So, for me, thinking outside the box is important - not just applying for online jobs (which doesn't work too well anyway) but also doing some creative stuff and seeking out other organisations through volunteer work etc.

I am learning more to take one day at a time. When you're in the middle of uncertainty, it can be pretty scary to think too much about the future. Thoughts like 'Will I ever find work I love', 'Will I ever find the relationship of my dreams', 'Will I end up broke', 'Will my world end' - okay maybe a bit dramatic, but these thoughts can easily creep in if we're not careful. I think the inner child work I'm doing and self-healing work is helping with these things. Learning to love and accept yourself, and be at peace whatever the circumstances, is key. That's not to say I don't have bad days - I have had some absolute stinkers recently. Awareness of what is triggering me is important, and allowing myself to feel shit and letting the storm pass .. I could do a whole blog post on this subject, but allowing things to be rather than resisting .. Part of our problem is that we make a problem worse by fighting it and wishing it wasn't there.

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So that's what I've learnt. What am I grateful for .. that I'm able to ride the storms of life a lot better than I used to .. that I saw my family this weekend and had my brother stay for a couple of nights .. that I went to the Yorkshire Dales on a beautiful day at the weekend .. that myself and my friend Mark have started working on a workshop we're planning to do .. that I have great online connections and friends .. That's all :)

I welcome your comments.

1 comment:

  1. Glad to hear you are finding things to be grateful for Andy. So glad you are letting the storm pass over instead of staying trapped in the storm thinking. Well done Andy! Your doing really well.

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