Saturday, 26 October 2013

Making changes - externally and internally

How many of you have been to a conference or listened to a motivational speaker or read a book or had a brief flash of inspiration and then been motivated to make big changes in your life? You start doing things differently, feel really motivated, appear to be making steps towards the life of your dreams .. and then that thing called LIFE gets in the way. You become busy at work or with family, and you end up losing your motivation to do the things that you know will be good for you to do. Before you know it, life is back at square one.

Many of us have. It's so easy, when you're pumped up and full of energy, to do things such as:
- Exercise more
- Eat healthier foods
- Make progress on a creative project
- Contact and network with people that will help you on your journey

.. and it's easier to have self-belief when you are on a bit of a buzz. But, feelings come and go, and you won't always have the feel-good feelings that make you all warm inside.

And, sometimes we decide we want to make these external changes because we are unhappy at where we are at right now, maybe even unhappy with ourselves. Whilst it's good to make external changes, change has to start from within. If we neglect our internal state, it will be virtually impossible to have sufficient motivation to continue with external changes we want to make. Lots of people want to lose weight, but often lack the strength of character to really do what they need to do. They then end up feeling disappointed with themselves.

The reality is, if someone sets themselves a goal to lose weight, but does not work on their self-esteem or internal state, they are likely to end up disappointed.

In my own life, I have had times where I can feel really motivated to change my life, change my career etc. But when things have got tough, I have quit easily.

Now, I'm at the stage where I realise I have to work at my own pace. I can get help from others, coaching/advice from others, and that all helps, and can certainly motivate me to try a bit harder. But I cannot overstretch myself. I am a big believer in taking small steps. And making external changes in my life is/will be a good thing, for sure.
But the place to start is internally, not externally. What is the point of trying to make big, external changes in my life if my self-esteem is still down the drain?

I blogged about my visit to London to see Mother Amma the other day, and I spoke about love, briefly. I think love is the most important thing when it comes to living our lives. Love is such a vast subject and I don't feel particularly qualified to talk about it in great detail.

But all the beautiful buildings in the world, all the good food recipes, all charities that are making a difference, as well as countless other things .. were all created from love.

If I want motivation to carry through on any intentions that I have, when things get tough and the good feelings are gone .. I feel that love is what will make the difference. Change myself, change my world. Change begins with you and me. We may not be able to save the world, but we can make a difference. I am finding that, once I get my own house in order, it becomes easier to do things you want to do and also you find that you get more synchronicities and things that happen or people that cross your path, just when you need them.

Animals can teach us so much about life
External achievements, good though they are, are second to internal happiness. Eckhart Tolle talks about this in The Power of Now. Our life purpose, whatever it may be, will then come from our state of being, and our acceptance of what is. It may take time to achieve your external goals. That's okay. I have not been very good at practicing this, but once you are not so attached to achieving your external aims ie for a relationship, for more friends, for your business to work, for your book to sell, for your children to be a bit nicer - it becomes easier for these things to come to pass.

Just some more musings on my journey .. hope you enjoyed reading.



  1. Good to hear your understanding being shared Andy!

  2. :-) I wondered if the post was done in a bit of a scatterbrained fashion as it was done quite spontaneously, but it's turned out good.


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