Saturday, 14 December 2013

Life is a reflection

My reflection ...
Over the last year, I have come to realise how much the outer circumstances of my life are a reflection of who I am and my beliefs. And also, I am doing my best to be patient with myself as I work on changing my belief systems and opening my heart.

It doesn't necessarily mean that if bad things happen to you, you are a bad person. But, in my experience at least, challenges come in order to reveal a part of myself. So for example, if I'm struggling with work - what are my beliefs about work? Perhaps there is something in me that feels like work is meant to be difficult and not enjoyable (which is surely what many people subconsciously think). If I'm struggling financially, I can find something within my mindset that says that I have always struggled with money, that I don't deserve money etc.

When situations arise that make you feel bad, welcome them rather than push them away. You may think that the situation itself is the cause of the problem - but, as has been said many times, different people can react differently to identical situations - for example, one person when hearing that their job is under threat may go into an immediate state of panic, and another person when hearing this may take stock of things in a more controlled way.

We all have triggers, and they vary from person to person depending on life experiences and beliefs about specific things. If something makes you feel bad, it's good, if you can, to investigate the reason why. From my own life, a simple example is that I really hate traffic queues. I realise that this is not uncommon, but I can get quite wound up when I get stuck in traffic, particularly when I'm racing against the clock. What is the reason for this? Well, I guess part of the reason is that I hate feeling 'stuck' and I much prefer things to go smoothly. So maybe I need to accept that life is not always smooth and to embrace the pitfalls and delays on the way .. although I have to admit it will be a minor miracle the day I am okay in traffic jams :)

A traffic queue is a regular everyday occurrence, certainly near Leeds. What about the deeper issues of life? I have come to realise, particularly over the last year, that some of the issues I've experienced throughout my life are a deeper reflection of me. As I heard someone say 'You don't get what you want, you get what you are.' I have gone a lot deeper into some of my beliefs about relationships and it's been interesting to find out what subconscious beliefs have really been hiding there. Same about work and money - I know that one of the reasons why I am not doing work I love is down to some of my beliefs about work and also about myself.

So I don't want to say that I'm trying to 'fix myself' - but certainly I want to continue working on my beliefs about life, about myself, about various situations - and I want to open my heart more to people and to life itself. It's not a quick fix. There are many lessons to learn along the way. Five years ago, I would not have been ready to learn some of the things I've learnt in the last year. I am learning more and more to trust in the process of life - and as someone who isn't naturally patient, it's not always easy.

But getting to a place of understanding how life is a reflection of who I am has been really helpful to me. So often, we try to deal with and change externals - whereas the state of our heart is actually more important. I am glad to know that every situation, good or bad, is an opportunity to see what part of my character is being reflected.

Anyhow, I hope you are looking forward to Christmas and New Year.



  1. Brilliant post hun. So true too, the inner state is so important and life truly does reflect what we believe. It takes time to change the inner state, to allow what we need to change to take place, without force or attachment.

  2. Thanks Kelly, yeah it takes a long time, or it did me, to really grasp all this :)


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