Saturday, 4 April 2015

(Being) Different - Day 4 of A to Z Blogging Challenge - Things I Love

I have always been a little different to the rest of the crowd, struggling to fit in. This has been hard at times. As anyone who knew me at school will confirm, I was the quiet one in the corner. As my geography teacher said in one of my reports, which is the only thing I still remember from any school report - '(Andrew) is in a world of his own'. I really didn't figure out how best to interact with my school peers and my world was completely different to most of theirs. For this reason, I'm quite grateful that I still have 3 people from my school year that I see from time to time and a few others that I'm friends with on Facebook.

Now, if I could do it all over again, I would probably want things at school to be a bit different. However, one benefit of my childhood was that it's made it a bit easier to follow my own pathway rather than go along with the crowd. I certainly don't go along with the stereotypical view of what a man should be. And I'm not a typically English person. I never really understood why people want to get drunk so often, and the stiff upper lip mentality, which is particularly prevalent in Yorkshire, can really get on my nerves.

Listen, I'm not suggesting that we should go around saying 'Look at me! I'm amazing because I don't follow the crowd! I can help save the world!' Being different is something that the mind/ego could easily use for its own ends. But, in order to truly live your best life, you cannot do so by following the crowd. Most people are still caught in the illusion of security, working 9 to 5 in jobs that aren't really what they want to be doing, having a house and car, but inwardly something is missing. You have to think differently from the majority in order to make a difference and do what you were born to do. There is a price to pay. And there are times when I wonder whether it's all worth it, times when I wish I lived a more conventional life, times when I find things damn tough.

Being different means that it's probably going to be harder to attract like minded friends and relationships. Often, the creative and sensitive people find it easier to be alone in some ways, even though part of them may desperately want a relationship and more friends. People who are different are likely to have gone through a lot of suffering. I mean, A LOT. The people who are drawn to the spiritual realm, and the people who are most likely to awaken to the truth of who they really are, are those that have suffered deeply, and those who are the 'black sheep' of either their family or peer group.
Sometimes, the road less travelled is uncertain, but worth the effort.

But I am proud that I am on the road less travelled, that I have managed to stay sane when I could have easily gone the other way. I am slightly weird. But the important thing for me is to be okay with who I am, and not look to a relationship or more money to make me fulfilled. Nothing in the future that you do not currently have is going to make you happy. It can be hard to find your place in the world when you are different. Even in some spiritual communities, I might struggle to fit in. Thankfully, I've found some good people who I do resonate with. That is a blessing.

Do you feel 'different' to most of society? Are you okay with this and are you able to accept yourself and accept life and society it is?


  1. Resonate a lot with this post Andy, yes different is how I have felt too. But lately I seem to be meeting a lot of 'different' people so think the world is beginning to shift.

  2. Yes, I can certainly identify with this post. Fortunately I found my husband early-- we were married at 22-- and he has supported my differences and even appreciated them, and then we had a houseful of children so we're all kind of different together.

  3. I feel different as well, and really agree that it's hard to find friends and partners because of this. I'm kind of shy and reserved, so it takes someone coming up to me and talking - and letting me talk! - to get me to open up. And, sadly, that type of person seems pretty rare around these parts.

    - Allison


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