Thursday, 18 May 2017

A few things this week has taught me

Well well. This one really has been one of the toughest weeks in a good while. It's pretty rare for me to get too depressed these days, but I certainly have got pretty low. The reasons why aren't too important, but .. wow .. we can go through some pretty crazy stuff in this human experience.

I've been through worse, for sure .. but part of me gets really panicky when the storms hit - survival mode gets activated. Another part of me is counting my blessings that I chose the spiritual path and that I have the tools to deal with the storms, however hard they may be. It makes things a bit more bearable.

So anyway, human nature being as it is .. we tend to grow more through the tough times. In fact, sometimes, the universe brings us situations, or has to bring us situations, that practically bring us to our knees - in order for us to change. If you're nice and comfortable, not wanting to face our own crap, then you might be able to get away with living an okay life. In fact, there's probably a fair few people who would not be able to properly deal with things when shit properly hits the fan.

In some ways, I envy people who have not faced significant mental health challenges. Okay, we all go through some shit, but some definitely go through more than others. If I was to reincarnate, I would probably prefer my life to be a little bit easier, at least in some ways. Certainly, the breakdowns I had in 2001 and particularly 2006 were the most horrendous thing imaginable. But, I kind of got the impetus to move up north after the second breakdown - so every cloud has a silver lining I guess.

Anyway - what have I learnt from this week?
1) Ask for help. For goodness sake, don't try and deal with shit yourself. One of the worst things about this world is that a divisive society has been created. We should all be working together and lifting others up when they are in need. Sadly, that doesn't always happen. But some people are too scared or too proud to ask for help - the worst thing you can do when you're depressed is to keep things hidden to yourself. I find Facebook a good outlet to express my feelings as and when I need to.

2) My heart isn't as open as I might want it to be. And I don't need to beat myself up for this.
As much as I might like to see myself as a good spiritual person, with an open and receptive heart and mind - the reality, at least at times, is that I can be closed off. Life has given me a bit of a battering, and it can take a good while for healing to occur - and I don't think there'll ever be a time when I have my shit sorted out. Plus I can just be resistant to life at times.

3) Sometimes life tests you to see if you can apply what you've learnt. Whilst life can still be tough at times, I have undoubtedly learnt a heck of a lot that can help me. That said, there may be times when it seems God or the universe has abandoned you. The situation with being out of work has got on top of me a bit this week - plus other areas where I have a few 'demons' to deal with have been crashing down on me.

4) It is about you - in some way at least. The subconscious mind can be a difficult thing to deal with - but much of your life is a reflection, in some way, of your deepest beliefs. It can take a lot of deep inner work - and help from a skilled therapist - to uncover and face your own shit. If you struggle in one particular area or more of life - you'll probably find there are deep underlying beliefs that partly explain these struggles.

5) One day at a time. My mind often races with anxiety about the future - and it can be hard to deal with that, especially if you're facing some kind of crisis - but do your best to take each day as it comes. It makes things a little easier.

6) Time spent in nature - like at Malham, below - is very beneficial.

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A few things this week has taught me

Well well. This one really has been one of the toughest weeks in a good while. It's pretty rare for me to get too depressed these days, ...